Ad Astra
by Descended From Elves
Summary: 'It was the first time she has allowed her emotions to take her over, to dominate her senses, and terrifying though it had been, it had also made her feel more real, more tangiable than ever before.'
1. Chapter 1

The character of Bellatrix LeStrange (I like it better with a capital s..) fascinates me, as does the older generation of Harry Potter, before James and Lily's time, really baack in the day.

We know so much about all the other generations, so not really knowing much about anyone before the 50's, apart from Voldemort and Dumbledore, makes me all the more interested. I've tried to create the characters Of Cygnus and Druella Black, and take a look into their household (dismal stuff!) and I think i'm quite happy with the result.

This is intended to be a two-parter, possibly three depending on how much I draw it out.

I do not own Harry Potter, obviously.

On a side note, I used to be called Fire of Serenity, so those stories are now under this new name.

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><p><em>It is a cold night, rain coming down in sheets. A dark haired girl, barely out of childhood clutches a small bag, standing at the end of a street. She is wearing Muggle clothes, smuggled to her in school, and a boy's jumper. She scrunches the end of one sleeve in her hand. The jumper smells of him.<em>

_The plan had been so simple to execute. Not waiting until she was alone in the house, but until there were as many other people there as the old manor could hold. She would __never have thought of that, but then she would never have realised that her parents cast so many protective spells, keeping danger out, and keeping their daughters in._

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><p>Bellatrix Black lay back on her bed, her dark eyes tracing the familiar cracks along the ceiling. she gave the impression of being casual, collected, but inside she was shaking. Tonight was the night. She would never sleep in this bed again. Her mother was in the kitchens, discussing the nights menu with the head cook, Lady of the Manor through and through. Her father was in his study, finishing off the day's business. Her sisters... they would be discussing Narcissa's future husband, the Malfoy's son. To Bellatrix's relief, their parents had decided that Narcissa, despite being four years younger than Bellatrix, and the youngest child, would be the most suitable candidate for marriage. She was perfect, tall and slender, with her mother's shimmering blonde hair and their father's intense black eyes, the only feature she shared with her sisters. Narcissa was genuinely interested in the running of a house, in new dresses and in Lucius Malfoy. She would make an outstanding wife.<p>

Andromeda on the other hand, did not have the breathtaking looks, but was gifted with soft brown curls and a gentler version of those black eyes. She was not as docile and obedient as Narcissa, but had an inner calmness that Bellatrix could not help but admire. The Black's could not have wished for two more marriageable daughters.

And then there was Bellatrix. Wilful and outspoken, the eldest child was a disappointment, not just because she had been born a girl instead of the desired male heir, but because her hair was wild, her skin was pale and she refused to obey her parents.

And so Bellatrix had come to her desicion. She would escape, run away, and never have to put up with her mother's despairing eyes as her eldest daughter showed her up in front of yet another suitor, never face her father's wrath when she spoke back to him and embarrased him in front of important people, or when she simply did not do as he said.

It was easier than she expected to indentify the protective charms cast around Black Manor, but even with her prodigous talent for magic, Bellatrix was still unable to fully brek them. Her spells would be noticed, and she could not put it past her father to get the whole of the Ministry, even a couple of Auror's, bought in to find her. With magic Bellatrix did not stand a chance. However, this did not put the girl off. She was well versed in stealth, cunning and little Muggle tricks such as lock-picking, something most people tended to overlook.

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><p><em>The girl looks back at the house she grew up in. A whole life was planned out for her back there, from who she would marry, to were she would live, right down to the funeral shroud that had been a birth gift from her father's mother. Another one of the morbid Black family traditions that she was leaving behind. If she had had any doubts, they were gone now. The thought of that shroud, thin and grey, with the Black family crest embroidered on it terrified her beyond reason. The idea that she could end her days wrapped up in that acursed thing was what sent her onwards.<em>

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><p>Bellatrix, ever resourceful, had chosen to wait until the house was full of guests before making her move. She had Muggle clothes stashed at the back of her wardrobe and now laid them out under her bed-covers, before adding a few final items to her suitcase which she then hid under her bed. Then, turning to her dressing table, she slipped back into the persona of the Black daughter she wore on the rare occasions she chose not to anger her family. It was a good job she did, because Andromeda chose that moment to knock on the door. Bellatrix grabbed at her powder, and attempted to bring some unlikely colour into her cheeks as her younger sister entered.<p>

'Bella, can I borrow some perfume, I've run out.' was Andromeda's opening line. Bellatrix complied, and the two girls continued beautifying themselves in the mirror. Something stirred in Bellatrix, somewhere in the reigon of her middle, and she took this as a sign. She had not been intending to tell Narcissa, but she and Andromeda did share the occasional sisterly moment, and it would be unfair of her not to know. To give even the smallest clue would set Bellatrix's mind at rest.

'Looking forward to the dance?' she began, innocently enough. Andromeda gave her a curious look, it was rare for Bellatrix to be so calm.

'Yes...' she replied cautiously, not wanting to break this moment.

'Good.'

There was another pause, then the older girl said;

'I might not be staying long.' To which Andromeda, abandoning all attempts to keep the peace burst out;

'Bella, you have to, you can't leave again! Or are you intending to go sneaking off with some entirely inapropriate boy, _again?_' Bellatrix turned to her sister, a moment of clarity taking over her mind.

'I didn't mean the dance, Addy, I meant here, this place. I intend to leave this house tonight.'

There was a pause, as the two girls stared at each other. Andromeda, her perfect eyes wide with disbelief and Bellatrix as fierce and defiant as ever.

'You... how?' Breathed Andromeda.

'The charms,' began Bellatrix, before being interupted.

'Charms?'

'Yes, the protective charms that mother and father have surrounded us with, oh don't look like that,' she added, for Andromeda's features had formed into a mask of shock at the news that she was being kept in magically, 'the charms are impossible to break. I originally intended to leave when I was alone, or at least when everyone else was preoccupied, but father would notice if I tried to leave under the spells, and I can only make a gap in the fabric of the charm, not entirely break it, meaning that someone would notice.' She stopped for breath, relief at finally being able to share her wonderful plan with someone blinding her the fact that Andromeda was sitting looking off to the side, her eyes narrowed with concentration, and her hands gripping the perfume bottle she had come to borrow uncommonly tight.

Bellatrix continued: 'The charms have to be removed for guests coming over though, otherwise we would appear to be rude. I find it quite fitting that their obsession with 'keeping up appearences', the whole reason they keep us here, will be my escape route. They have to weaken their defenses for decencies sake, and then I can make my entirely indecent escape! Isn't it delicious?'

Bellatrix sat back, catching her breath again. This was the happiest she had ever been in her life, the happiest, in fact, she was ever going to be. She looked at Andromeda for a response, but at that moment, their mother, Druella Black strode into the room.

'Andromeda, to your own room. Go and finish getting ready, now.' Said the grand-looking woman. Bellatrix, terrified that her mother had overheard her plan, didn't dare to look in Andromeda's direction.

'Bellatrix,' said Druella, 'I have come to ask a favour of you. I know you find it difficult, seeing your youngest sister engaged before you, this shows in the way you constantly misbehave. You are not a woman given to marriage, I can see that, even if your father cannot.' There was a moment of silence, and Bellatrix realised she was supposed to fill it.

'Oh, I... I suppose I am not...' She replied hesitantly.

'Indeed. That is why I must ask you to not behave as befits a young woman of the House of Black this night. Your father has taken it upon himself to offer you up to Rudolphus LeStrange as a wife. But I will not see my eldest daughter disgraced by a marriage below her status. I therefore ask you to misbehave, to shock and to horrify, just for this one night.'

All Bellatrix could do was gape.

'Yes... yes mother, of course!' She gasped. Druella responded with a rare smile. She reached over and touched her daughters shoulder. Bellatrix sat up straight, trying not to move. She didn't want to shatter this unexpected moment of maternal affection from her mother, who had only ever shown vauge disapointment to her. Druella sighed. she wanted to say something, to tell Bellatrix that she... loved her perhaps, as only a mother could. Instead, all she could muster was;

'You are a good girl, Bella.'

There was another moment of silence, then she left, looking behind her as she did, and meeting her daughter's eyes for the first time as an equal. Bellatix was stunned, all thoughts of running away temporarily blown from her mind. How unfair it was that the only time her mother showed her any kind of respect and affection, she intended to leave. However, a life-time without that affection had made Bellatrix tough, so she forced herself up and away from the dressing table, and went through her plan again. By the time the guests were beginning to arrive she had stowed the feelings aroused by her mother's visit at the back of her mind, in the place she kept the best and worst moments of her life and had prepared herself immaculately for the evening.


	2. Chapter 2

This is turning out to be a lot longer than I had intended.

Reviews are my Euphoria Elixir.

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><p>The dancefloor was slowly filling with revolving couples, Narcissa and Lucius at the centre of it all. Bellatrix had been perfectly horrid to the LeStrange family, turning her nose up at Madam LeStrange's outdated dress and refusing to dance with Rudolphus. She had flirted with Rabastan LeStrange, then as soon as she saw her father begin to turn to him as a new candidate for her husband, stalked off to find more wine. Her mother gave her a sly smile and handed her a full glass instead of the usual half-filled one.<p>

She began enjoying herself a little too much after that glass, dancing with older, often married men, and swishing her skirts dramatically as soon as a member of the LeStrange family came close. She realised by the time she had almost fallen over on the way to the bathroom that it was time to go, before she got really drunk and was unable to make a proper escape. Thoughts of her plan sobered Bellatrix up almost instantly, and her newly sharpened mind began to implement phase one.

Bellatrix made her way back to the great hall, were the dancing was still in full swing. Dismissing requests from a couple of married men, desperate to dance with the famously innapropriate Black girl, she made her way up to her father. Standing behind him she carefully assesed his state of mind. He was with a few of his political allies, drinking the very finest firewhisky, calling for another bottle, judging by his state, the third or fourth of the night. He would be out until late the next day, so Bellatrix left him, and went to observe her mother. Druella was circling the room, stopping to exchange a few comments with choice guests. Bellatrix noticed her giving a rather imperious nod to the disgruntled looking Madam LeStrange, who then rose to her feet. Bellatrix drew closer to hear Druella's words.

'Madam LeStrange, are you leaving us already?' She seemed to be ignoring the fact that her guest had merely risen to her feet, not idicated her imminent departure, and Madam LeStrange was sharp enough to notice the snub. However, politeness dicatated that she didn't cause trouble, especially if she was clinging to the hope that one of her son's could one day own Black Manor, so she was forced to agree, and make her farewells. Bellatrix had never appreciated her mother's immense social skills until that point, and the fact that this intervention was on her own behalf tugged at the girl's heartstrings. She stood, unable to move until she noticed her mother coming towards her. There was no time to leave, so she allowed herself to be steered into a small alcove by Druella.

'Bellatrix, I... I must congratulate you. Your behavoir tonight has reached a new level of atrocity.' She gave another of her brief, tense smiles.

'Thank you, mother.' Druella looked down at her eldest daughter, again wishing she could say something. Bellatrix made to leave and the older woman let her. She watched her daughter sashay across the dancefloor, turn back for a moment and wink at her. Druella sat down heavily on the alcove's small bench, watching her three daughters.

Narcissa: dancing with her with her fiance, the handsome Lucius Malofy, so much in love. The perfect one.

Andromeda: sitting with her little group of friends, chatting and gossiping. The good one.

Bellatrix: flirting with an old ministry official, dark eyes glinting. The bad one.

Druella Black slowly stood up, trying to shake herself out of this melancholy mood. It was unsurprising really, this emotional discomfort, especially considering the conversation she had overheard as she stood outside Bellatrix's bedroom.

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><p>Bellatrix swept upstairs to her room, the new necklace she had been given by that preposterous LeStrange boy earlier would make her a pretty penny when she sold it on the black market, the chosen destiation for most of the jewels she had been given in her life. Her suitcase had been hard to close, so she was loath to re-open it, choosing instead to tuck the necklace into the pocket of her Muggle jacket. Then she sat down on her bed and looked around her room. She had to leave, it was now or never. The dance was reaching it's climax downstairs, and the entire household, besides herself, was enjoying it. She hurriedly changed into her Muggle clothes, a simple black dress, her own stockings and flat black shoes, and the a heavy man's coat. The outfit was chosen for stealth, not style, but Bellatrix could not resist adding a dark green ribbon to her hair. She may be on the run from it, but she was still a daughter of the Black House.<p>

Taking the servants stairs, built before house-elves were given apparation rights and now blessedly unused, Bellatrix made her way down to the cellars. Amongst the the dusty shelves of whisky and wine she had identified a section of the wall where the bricks were loose, and had been sneaking down here in the dead of night for months, working away at the stone-work with innocent water charms, the kind of magic her father would not see as a threat to his protective enchantments. Now she could easily push her way through and out into the world. Dragging away the last few bricks, Bellatrix crept through the small hole, the cold night air hitting her like a knife. It was raining lightly, though the air threatened more. She quickly set about replacing the bricks, but couldn't seal them together, just in case there were some detection spells remaining in this deserted corner of the house. Allowing herself no time to rejoice in the victory of breaking free, Bellatrix crept along the side of the house. She had been studying old plans of Black Manor in the extensive family history section of the library, and had located a servants passage out. This was riskier than the staircase as the house-elves were often sent on errands during dances, though Bellatrix was fairly sure she had devised fool-proof instructions for any that questioned her.

'Go back into the house, do not communicate in any with anything or anyone. Go to my room, and drink enough of the Forgetfulness Potion to wipe the memory of meeting and coversing with me, and of taking the potion. Do not think of this ever again.'

Her plan could not be more thorough. She even allowed herself to stop, and take one last look at the house. Had she not, had she continued through the servants gate she might never have become the person she was when she died.


	3. Chapter 3

This is more a Bellatrix fic than before, the transition from her childhood self to her adult (read Deatheater) self.

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><p><em>Imagine living in place where you cannot help but be different. Imagine disagreeing with every word spoken by your family. Imagine feeling shame and despair every time you look at your cold, unfeeling parents and your indoctrinated sisters. Imagine knowing that the people you should love more than anything else are evil. Imagine being the only one with goodness in your heart.<em>

Bellatrix stared back at the cellar she had just left. The small grimy window should have been impossible to pick out in the darkness, but she could see a light swinging and flickering behind it. She watchedm frozen with horror as the loose bricks of her escape route began to shift. One suddenly fell though to the ground, and thew muffled thud awoke Bellatrix to the fact that she had to hide. Now. Pushing back into the bushes at the side of the path she watched the wall she had just re-built come down again. Her eyes strained in the darkness. The person emerging from the cellar had only one candle, the enchanted green flame flickering dimly, but staying alight in the increasingly heavy rain. The person finally clambered out of the hole, much less gracefully, Bellatrix noticed absently, than she had, and glanced around before heading for the path. they didn't even bother to replace the stones, marking them out as some kind of amautre, someone not used to sneaking around. Bellatrix still couldn't tell who they were, but it was obviously someone who was not going to give her too much trouble. She stepped out onto the path, placing herself between her follower and the gate. She dropped her hood, showing the other person that, Muggle clothes or not, she meant trouble for them. The person stopped. There was a silence as they took Bellatrix in, then they reached up and pulled the hood of their cloak away.

Bellatrix could not help it, she staggered backwards slightly.

'Addy?'

Her younger sister took a step forward.

'Bella.' she smiled darkly at her sister's shocked face. 'Beginning to regret telling me that plan of yours are you?'

'What are you doing?'

Andromeda gave a low laugh,

'What does it look like Bella? I'm running away. Your plan was quite ingenious, by the way, I could never have come up with something like that.' Bellatrix stepped forward, angry now.

'You can't do this. You can't!'

Andromeda stepped forward too.

'I can do whatever you can do _Bellatrix._ Why should I have to stay here whilst you run off?'

'Because.. because you fit in here! I have to get out, Andromeda, and if that means I have to hex you, then so be it.' she drew her wand and pointed it at her sister. It was Andromeda's turn to look shocked. She hadn't counted on this reaction from her sister, but Bellatrix's eyes falshed with a manic light. It was as though a sudden passion had flared up inside her usually dark, closed sister. But still, she wasted no time in drawing her own wand from the pocket of her muggle skirt. She tossed aside her cloak.

'Nice disguise Addy, shame about the utterly non-Muggle cloak. Another example of your own stupidity there, can't even get the costume right.' hissed Bellatrix. The girls begun to pace around each other in a circle. 'You would still be in the house without me. I would say I'm never sharing my secrets with you again, but I don't think that'll be a problem, what with me _leaving tonight._'

'I'm not letting you stand between me and freedom Bellatrix. Stand aside and we can both leave.'

'Ha!' shrieked Bellatrix, her body convulsing and her arms throwing out to this side in an unusal gesture. 'Why should I believe you, you deceitful little bitch!' Andromeda stared at her sister through the heavy rain It was as though she was falling apart in front of her. This was the only time she had ever seen her sister show wild emotion, and it was almost terrifying to behold, like madness.

'Stupefy' cried Bellatrix, sparing no thought for the enchantments that could still be defending the house. Andromeda blocked her and sent another stinning spell back, which Bellatrix dodged with ease. She snarled, all of the elegant Black daughter persona dropping away as she did so. The two girls danced around each other, deflecting spells and attempting to break each others stride with no luck, until Bellatrix suddenly caught Andromeda. The younger girl fell backwards into the mud with a cry of surprise. Bellatrix advanced on her, and stood above her as she struggled to stand up again. But the pounding rain hed made the path slippery, and Bellatrix shoved her down again.

'I don't want to do this Addy, she said, her voice softer now, but you don't understand. I have to get away from here. She bent closer. I'm so sorry, Addy.'

The two pairs of dark eyes, set in who faces so alike, met one another for the very last time. Bellatrix raised her wand. She had never used this spell, but knew that she wanted to. It was the only way to get away from here.

_'Crucio!'_

A wild rush of joy suddenly coursed through Bellatrix's veins, a sense of being alive, of intense power filled her. She instinctively knew how to twist her wand, causing more pain to Andromeda, screaming on the ground. _Andromeda._ Addy.

Bellatrix pulled back, stared at her wand hand, her eyes running the length of the wood in her hand, then moving to Andromeda, panting and curld into a ball. She turned away, the feeling of power leaving as soon as it had come, leaving her empty, and a little lonelier than before. it was the first time she has allowed her emotions to take her over, to dominate her senses, and terrifying though it had been, it had also made her feel more real, more tangiable than ever before. She didn't look back at her sister, but picked up her coat and put it back on. She picked up her suitcase and and headed for the gate. She didn't hear Andromeda shifting over the rain until it was too late.

'Stupefy.'

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><p>Reviews are beautiful.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

I've not exactly been flooded with reviews, but it's early days yet, and I hate to leave a story unfinished.

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><p>Bellatrix's eyes shot open. Her room was in darkness, and the house was silent. She quietly crept over to her window and drew back the curtains. The window itself would not open, and if she tried, her father would hear about it. Two months since she had been found slumped over her suitcase in the bushes, covered in a cloak, her coat gone. Two months and she still had not been outside.<p>

Narcissa had left three weeks after Andromeda's disapearence. Over that short time, the two remaining sisters had never left each others company, and Bellatrix had explained everything, told Narcissa everything that had happened that night, save one. The Cruciatus curse was, in her re-telling, changed for a simple stunning spell. Bellatrix had felt something like tears behind her eyes as she watched the new Narcissa Malfoy leave the house for the last time.

And now here she was, on the night before her wedding. Her parents did not speak to her, her meals were brought up by house-elves, who appareted in at set times. There was a pain at the back of her head that had blossomed there two months ago and would not go away.

Bellatrix LeStrange.

It did not sound right.

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><p>Bellatrix LeStrange still did not sound right when she was married the next day. She caught her mother's eye at the end of the ceremony, and Druella looked incomparably sad beside Cygnus, who was putting on his best 'proud father' display and fooling not one of the esteemed guests who all knew what had happened in the Black household.<p>

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><p>Bellatrix never exchanged another word with her parents.<p>

The world grew darker by the day, and she resorted to casting the Cruciatus curse on animals to keep her blood flowing. That pain was the only thing in her life she had ever had control over.

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><p>Not a month passed before Bellatrix was initiated into the inner circle of Tom Riddle's followers.<p>

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><p>RR


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